Overcoming inner demons that affect your relationships
Founder of Mr Healthy Love
Having grown up in a dysfunctional family and my parents separating at the age of three, I was unable to share my feelings throughout my childhood which prevented me from speaking my truth. I grew up living in fear. Fear of death, fear that I would be abandoned and fear that I would not have any money and my home would be repossessed.
At the time I wasn't aware of this dysfunction, co-dependency and narcissism within my family - I thought that I had had a rather normal upbringing. Yet, when it came to relationships in my adolescence, I found that I had many insecurities. I didn't even know what anxiety was, but I felt a lot of fear to even approach a girl. If I managed to go on more than one date I would have an innate fear of abandonment whenever my perception was that the girl was taking too long to reply to a text or they were losing interest. I would try to hide and cover these fears, but women have almost a sixth sense about authenticity, and would run a mile! It took me many years to self reflect and overcome these challenges and now I am using my experiences to help others overcome their inner fears in the dating world and moreover in relationships that follow, whatever their background.
Overcoming my inner fears
By facing my fears, I realised I had been living a life that was filled with shame. I had not had enough encouragement and love throughout my childhood, which later manifested itself into not believing I was good enough in many aspects of my life. In a multitude of ways it is what drove me to be academically successful, having received an upper second class honours in law, because I was trying to prove that I was enough.
Yet, for all of my successes, I never felt that I was good enough in whatever I had achieved. This mindset also surfaced in relationships, and even if a beautiful girl was dating me I would destroy any attraction that she had by my own fears and insecurities.
After years of reflection, self-study, experiences and failures, I managed to find the key to what attracts men and women and what turns them off, and what you need to be able to maintain a relationship. I am here today to help you overcome your inner demons to get what you want in your life!
'James is passionate and knowledgeable about his subject and shows a genuine ability to have a sound insight into, and assess different situations.
He was able to deal with issues such as self-motivation and tweaking my bad habits in relationships.
I now have him on speed dial.'
- Dr Jay J
'At 32 years old I had had some minor sexual experience but never gone the 'whole way'. I wasn't entirely sure why this was; my initial desire was there but as soon as something started happening I would switch off.
James helped me confront and overcome this multi-faceted fear in a manner that therapists had failed to do.
I am now confident and enjoying a normal, healthy sex life as I had always wanted and at times in the past thought I would never achieve. I thoroughly recommend James!'
- F T (Anonymous)
'James went out of his way to listen to my situation and approached it with honesty and care. Someone I would have no problems to reach out to again.
I got great advice that I agree with and feel as if it was a close friend giving it.
Definitely worth to reach out if you feel you need to on any depth of situation. Thank you again.'
- Ryan P
'James really helped me put into perspective how to handle my current situation. He made me realise that living in the moment and enjoying your situation for what it is is better for your own health and growth as a person as opposed to being preoccupied with the future and what might become.
Thank you so much James!!'
- Sarah P
' I found James on Tik Tok and really enjoyed the advice he provided in a lot of his videos, I wanted to ask him a question of my own, so I did and don't regret it at all! He was super helpful and kind and now I have a better idea of what I'm going to do in my relationship!
'James has given me guidance and advice through a difficult milestone in my current relationship. He has helped me to process my thoughts and has given me the confidence and skill to continue forward in a calm but mature way.
James has amazing listening skills and knowledge of himself and others.'
New Hampshire, USA
'I first found James on Instagram and began watching some of his videos. They resonated with me immediately.
His practical and logical approach to dating and interacting with women is easy to follow and it just makes sense.
He already helped me a ton and I'm looking forward to reading his book.'
- Peter T